So I've been lurking for a day or two, doing a few hours of research on (in before rage) actual self-inflation. I've done it twice so far; the first with just air swallowing plus a little water to prevent burping. That went very well, highly enjoyable, etc.
The second time, which was a few hours ago, I attempted a bike pump in the anus in the shower. I thought it wasn't working very well because I couldn't really get the nozzle in all the way, just the needle-ish part (didn't hurt when it went in), but it actually did.