Bloating Myself?

TeenTummy, there's no way to "really" make yourself that big without severely injuring yourself. Please do not try!

The easy and safe way is by using a latex weather balloon under a pair of maternity pants or something else high-waisted and very stretchy. You can heighten the intensity of the experience by inflating the balloon while standing in front of a mirror, and doing it slowly- a form of solo breathplay- using a secret method developed by Latecomer, as follows: 

This technique uses a couple of one-way air valves which you can salvage from an industrial-style black rubber dust respirator with  a single replaceable filter cartridge, plus the flexible pleated air hose from an old-style hood-type hair dryer. Both of these things can be found in junk stores or thrift shops, or off ebay. You will also need a white plastic tee-fitting from the plumbing section of your local hardware store and some duct tape. 

Another handy and convenient source of these check valves is a foot-operated bellows pump of the sort used to inflate big rubber rafts. Each of these pumps will have two check valves in it which can be removed with a little care and some hand tools and they usually come with pleated plastic air hose which you can use instead of the hose from a hair dryer. Thrift stores are where you buy these pumps, if you do not want to pay full price at a sporting goods store.

You will need some dexterity with hand tools too, but not much. 

Now, the rubber dust mask will have two exhale valves in it on either side of the filter cartridge which pass air out of the mask when the wearer exhales, but prevent dirty air from entering the mask when the wearer inhales. The filter cartridge will have a similar valve on it which allows the wearer to breathe in filtered air through the filter but prevents exhalations from going the wrong way out the filter. What you want to do is to carefully pry out the exhale valves from the mask and remove the cartridge. In place of the filter, jam in one end of the hair dryer hose. Fasten it in place with a wrap of duct tape if it is not a tight enough fit to stay put by itself. 

Next you carefully pry out each of the exhale valves and cork off the holes in the mask with a strip of duct tape across the inside of the mask plus a second strip of duct tape across the outside of the mask, covering each hole. You press the strips of duct tape together where they cover the hole so they adhere tightly to each other, thereby making an air-tight seal and preventing the holes from leaking air. 

With the filter holes blocked off and the hose in place, the dust respirator mask now resembles an oxygen mask on a hose and the only way for air to enter or exit the mask is through the hose. 

Using duct tape, you attach one leg of the tee fitting (which was chosen to be about the right size for a good fit with the hose) to the end of the hose with some duct tape and then install a check valve in one of the other legs of the tee so air can flow into the tee fitting but not out. On the other leg of the tee you install the other check valve, turned around backwards so it lets air flow out of the tee but not in.

At this point, if you put on the mask and hose arrangement and try to breathe, when you inhale, air enters the check valve on the tee and flows up through the hose and into the mask. When you exhale, air flows back down out the hose and exits the tee through the other check valve. The mask-and-valve arrangement plus your own lungs now form an air pump with which you are going to blow up the balloon under your clothes, as follows:

Cut a SMALL hole in the front of the pants or other garment in a spot corresponding to where your belly button would be. Stuff the balloon inside the garment and route the fill neck out the belly button hole. Connect the fill neck to the EXHALE valve on the tee, so that when you exhale, air flows out the tee and into the BALLOON. 

Put on the mask and blow a couple of deep breaths into the balloon and then reach inside the garment to unfurl the balloon and unkink the fill neck so the balloon will freely inflate into a sphere. Now stand in front of the mirror and admire the result: it looks like you have an inflation hose running from your mask into your belly button, and each time you breathe out, your belly gets bigger. 

If you prefer, the entry point for the air flow can be the crotch of the garment but this requires a longer air hose (see below for an important warning regarding the length of this hose). 

Since your exhalations fill the hose leading to the balloon and since the "tee valve" (as it is known in the community) is on the balloon end of the hose, you will necessarily inhale your own exhalations for at least part of every breath you take with the mask on. This process is going to oxygen-deprive you, which some people find exciting, and furnish the sensation of having someone blowkiss you, which some people find very exciting. To keep from suffocating yourself, you breathe VERY DEEPLY which will get some fresh outside air into the mask when you need it. By trimming the overall length of the air hose, you can make it short enough to guarantee that a deep breath WILL furnish fresh air to your mask, which is vitally important. Nobody wants you to suffocate while doing this, OK? PROMISE ME you WILL trim that hose!

If you do NOT want this effect to happen, you simply attach the tee fitting to the MASK and then  run the hose from the tee OUTLET down to the balloon. This way you get fresh air every time you inhale. Less risky. 

You breathe in and out, and you get bigger and bigger... and bigger... and BIGGER. Big fun!

Note that this method does NOT work with ordinary party balloons, which are too stiff. It can be made to work with plastic trash bags, which are very inexpensive (in stark contrast to a 36" diameter weather balloon, which might cost you $25 to $35 on the Web (unless you find a surplus store that has a cheap stock of weather balloons, like Latecomer did) but since a trash bag will not inflate into a "pregnancy profile" on its own, you will need to rely on the shape and stretchyness of the garment to urge the trash bag into the shape you want.

Note that those latex weather balloons are very delicate and easily-torn. Be very careful handling them, as the heartbreak of getting all set for an inflation session only to rip a hole in the balloon can be pretty heavy. 

One last point: as your belly inflates, there will be a tendency for the pants to pull down. You may require straps or suspenders of some sort to keep the waistband in place as you become progressively more "pregnant". A favored garment with straps in it already is a one-piece maternity swimsuit.